Weekly Lowlights From the Turlock Police Log


Welcome back to Weekly Lowlights. After a brief Spring Break respite, I have decided to present a kinder, gentler version of malfeasant meanderings through happy meadows of ignorance and innocence.

On April 24, Turlock police responded to a 911 call at 1:26 p.m. from the intersection of Grant Avenue and Chestnut Street. The caller complained that Robert Lair, 42, allegedly appeared to be high on drugs and had placed his face against the window of her car as she was stopped in traffic. Perhaps he was looking for some leftover chocolate Easter eggs?

When police found Lair, they noted that he appeared to be under the influence and he provided a false name. It is believed he provided the name “Egbert the Easter Bunny.” Police say he then tried to leave the scene by hopping away like he was carrying an Easter egg basket. Turns out he had a felony warrant out of Merced for $100,000.

At 2:43 a.m. on April 26, Stephen Montgomery, 22, headed over to his ex-girlfriend’s house for a gathering in the 2400 block of Cambridge Court. According to police, Montgomery wasn’t being a good boy and he wasn’t getting along with the other boys and girls. He was asked to leave, but then he threw a tantrum. He reportedly used a wooden stick to hit the ex-girlfriend in the leg and another female over the head. He then left in a vehicle, but was quickly found on Highway 99. He was arrested for assault with a deadly weapon. It is rumored that Montgomery had the same problem in kindergarten. He would hit a girl and then take off on his tricycle. More than 18 years later, little has changed.

At 6:17 p.m. on April 28, Quiana Stallworth, 33, was anything but stalwart in her honesty when she allegedly attempted to cash a check at Bank of the West on Fulkerth Road. A fraud alert was on the account and police responded to arrest her for commercial burglary and allegedly attempting to cash an altered check.

Earlier that same day Doroteo “Dorito” Gonzalez, 18, was arrested at Walmart for robbery and possession of paraphernalia after he boldly threatened to shoot a security guard who was attempting to detain him for shoplifting. Of course, no weapons were located on Gonzalez. It is rumored that he was stealing a family-sized bag of cool ranch Doritos. Those kind are the best. They keep coming out with new flavors, but cool ranch is still the best in my book.

On May 1 at just after midnight, the M&M twins were up to no good. Nathaniel Marsaw, 42, and Rosalva Morfin, 43 were contacted by police because they were in a suspicious vehicle at F Street and Minaret Avenue. Marsaw, who happened to be on probation, was found to be in illegal possession of a prescription medication. I wonder if it was morphine? His girlfriend, Morfin, happened to have an active felony warrant. Both Morfin and Marsaw were arrested and booked.

Later on May 1, at just before 11 p.m., Manuel Machado evidently just couldn’t get enough Ranch Burger at 690 C Street. Police say he had a stay away court order prohibiting him from approaching the business. He was arrested and booked for violating the stay away order. I personally have never been to Ranch Burger; I hear its pretty good though. One of these days I’ll make it by there.

Comments 10

  1. Tori lair says:
    [b]my brother is Robert lair and he is mentally disabled and because of all the times that we called and asked for help from the mental health and the police I think your article is s*** he's not mentally capable of Easter Egg Hunting nor was that anything to do with what he was doing he actually thought that it was me in the car so shOve your articles and your (*edited by tcn) journalism up your ass! Oh and you're right he was under the influence ... of medications retard. your lucky I don't sue your (*edited by tcn).
  2. Interested person says:
    Dear Tori Lair,
    Can you please provide us with information on his felony? I would love to know what he did. Also, is he under your care? Did he go to Turlock schools or Merced?
  3. Ben Dover says:
    Hmmm, Tori - medications are not supposed to make the individual taking them seem like they're under the influence of anything. If they do produce that effect, the meds are being abused or should not have been prescribed to the individual. Also if your brother has issues, he should be properly supervised at all times. Also it is **you're lucky** not your...
  4. carl martinez says:
    I am a lifelong friend of both Tori and Robert. I feel that a journalist should stick to the facts and not embellish with his "humor". Though I do not condone what Robert may have done, I cannot help but wonder what the reporter finds funny about a man with a mental issue. I think that turlock crime beat will probably be the pinnacle for this "journalist."
  5. thetruthbeknown says:
    seems this news journalist is fabricating stories and could easily be sued for doing so for defamation of character among other things-STICK TO THE FACTS
  6. Julia says:
    It is really hard to take someone seriously that writes a crime blog in such a snarky way, making fun of the subject of crime. I can only think that the person who writes this drivel couldn't get a job from the Penny Saver, so he has to "work" (I bet he doesn't make much writing this tripe) doing this.
  7. T says:
    I am sorry, but you have to have character to have it defamed.
  8. Julia says:
    Dear Jonathan,

    I can understand the need to defend yourself from criticism with regard to the nastiness with which you write, it is unfortunate that you did not include your real name in your response to your own "column". My opinion, which I am allowed to have, is that you approach a serious topic with a cavalier attitude when it deserves much more gravity than you give it. My point is that you do an injustice to those of us that want the straight talk about what goes on in this city without your immature snark and junior high school outlook. The subject of addiction, crime, and the degradation to our community needs a sober approach, which you completely lack. Those of us that have been victims of crime (I had an aunt that was murdered, lost a cousin to a drunk driver, lost a cousin to a suicide because they were completely depressed about their addiction, and I have a brother who is a schizophrenic that has done time because of his mental illness) do not always appreciate those who seek to glorify themselves by making a mockery of crime. You remind me of Nancy Grace, and that is the worst sort of insult I could give you.
  9. Cindy says:
    You guys need to email, text, or call the publisher and tell him that this column should be stopped. If he's intelligent and respectful he will change the way this column is written. He's a good man.

    Publisher: David "DJ" Fransen
  10. razor says:
    the quiana stallworth one she was telling the truth and also you shouldnt be making fun of these people some of them was innocent

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